The Beginning

I'm not sure why I'm starting this blog...except that I have several things that I want to do this year, and I want to make them happen. I hope that writing them down will do that. First, about me. I'm 28. I live with my parents, I work full time and am studying for my masters part time. I'm taking 3 classes this semester, and will graduate in May. I cannot wait.

Although there are exciting things happening for me, I'm more excited about the things that are happening in my family. My younger sister got engaged last year, and will be getting married in July. I'm so happy for her I can't explain it. I love her fiance, and see how happy he makes her. I couldn't wish for more for my sister.

Even with all of these great things, I'm not happy. I'm not sure why, but it's true. Part of me thinks it's because I still live at home. part of me thinks it's because I'm overweight. Part of me thinks it's because I'm the single, spinster older sister. I'm not sure what is real and what is not. But the thing is, I want to be happy.

So to that effect, I have some goals for this year. I have to fix the things that I'm not happy about. So what does that entail? Well, the first two are obvious.

1a. Lose Weight. This is going to be done in 2 large chunks, with many many smaller chunks. The first large chunk? Lose 40 pounds by the wedding. That's not nothing. That's a lot. And I'm stalling myself as I do this. For 2 weeks I busted my ass and lost nearly 10 lbs. Then over the past 3, we had holidays, and I didn't go to my WW meeting, and I fell apart. I'm scared of Saturday's number. But I want it to be 210 or less. That means losing about 2 lbs in the next 3 days. That's not nothing honey! But I can do it.

1b. Lose weight. Losing weight for the wedding is important, but it's not enough. Not enough weight that is. I am 5'2 and I weigh over 200 lbs. That is so inappropriate. My big goal is to lose 80lbs by Christmas 2011. That would put me around 140 overall.

2. Move out. This is hard. I look at the money that I should have been saving over the past 6 years, and I get so mad at myself. Though really, it's the past 3 years. I was great bout saving before I went to Australia. And then I came back, and I stopped. I didn't have a goal. I didn't have anything, and I spent spent spent and didn't save. Now, I think I may be able to save enough to move out by August. I want to have at least $6,000 in the bank before I move out to help me w/ emergencies.

3. Go on a trip. One of the other things I'm trying to save for is a trip to Scotland. I met awesome people from there who invited me to stay with them. In my dream world, I'd go to Scotland, England, and Ireland and spend a week in each. This may not be possible, but it is important to me that I go on this trip this August. When I graduate, I hope to get a job in a school as a librarian. I hope to leave my current job in the beginning of August, and then start a new one in September. I don't know if this is possible, but I want it badly. This trip is my gift to myself for finishing my degree and moving forward.

So, in about 5 minuets THe Biggest Loser will end for the night. I look at these people, and I think, I can do this too. So, while I watch "Parenthood" I will be on my treadmill, walking if nothing else, for the whole hour. I need to do this. And I hope I can pull it off. I really really do. Wish me luck.